Attending this year's National Funeral Directors Association International Convention and Expo in New Orleans was eye-opening and scary. I wasn't sure it would be a good idea—I was afraid it might be triggering. But I decided to go because, after my experience of losing my husband and having to plan his funeral, I know firsthand how important it is to navigate grief, healing, and self-care. My day at the Expo added to my grief journey, giving me a new perspective on loss and how we can honor those we love.
At the Expo, I spoke with Gail Marquardt, Vice President of Consumer Engagement/Remembering A Life, about the platform devoted to helping families honor their loved ones while supporting them on their grief journey. She shared several resources with me, but two were very helpful on this journey: the Remembering A Life Journey Cards and the Have the Talk of a Lifetime Conversation Cards. They reminded me of the power of storytelling and the legacies we build daily, often without even realizing it.
One of the most powerful parts of healing in grief is sharing stories. It's one of the reasons I started my podcast nearly four years ago: to give myself and other women a place to tell our stories. The Remembering A Life Journey Cards are designed with that purpose in mind, giving us prompts to reflect on their lives and our own emotions, helping us process memories that might otherwise feel overwhelming. These cards also allow us to hold space for our grief.
The Have the Talk of a Lifetime Conversation Cards offer an incredible way to initiate meaningful conversations with family. These cards ask questions that help us learn more about our loved ones. They're not just about the loss; they can help us build connections while they are still here. I know it can be challenging to have these conversations—I get that more than anyone—but they're necessary. I only knew my husband for nine years and wish I'd asked him more questions.
Another part of the Expo I experienced was learning about the evolving choices for honoring loved ones with alternative burials. I saw vendors offering terramation and water cremation, eco-friendly options that allow us to celebrate our loved ones in ways that reflect their values. I was also able to visit with vendors who created jewelry from flowers and memorial keepsakes from thumbprints. Knowing that there are non-traditional options feels empowering, and it's comforting to see more families choosing meaningful, personal ways to say goodbye.
One thing that's true about grief is how lonely it can feel once the world moves on. Remembering A Life provides resources like comfort boxes, keepsakes, and gentle reminder texts that reach out to people during tough days, like anniversaries or holidays. These simple but thoughtful gestures remind us that grief doesn't have an end date and that support can be there even when the world seems to have moved on.
With the 5th anniversary of my husband's passing coming up, I feel that truth more than ever. Grief has no expiration date. It's comforting to know that services are available that allow us to remain connected to our loved ones and remind us that it's okay to grieve at our own pace.
Self-Care Tips for Navigating Grief
In my experience, practicing self-care during grief has been transformative. Here are my self-care tips for navigating grief:
Allow Yourself to Feel: Grief brings out every emotion, and that's okay. Let yourself feel it all without judgment. Writing it down in a journal helps to process it all.
- Take it One Day at a Time: Grief can overwhelm everything. Take it one day at a time. On tough days, even taking a walk outside or taking a few deep breaths is an act of self-care.
- Share Stories and Memories: Talking about your loved one and sharing stories can be healing. Grief has no time limit, so don't think that you have to stop.
- Seek Support: Don't be afraid to lean on others for support. Find a therapist and remember that we don't have to go through it alone.
- Honor Your Needs: Grief is exhausting, so listen to your body. Rest, eat well, and give yourself breaks without guilt.
- Create Simple Rituals: Little rituals—like lighting a candle or listening to your loved one's favorite song—can help keep their memory close.
- Be Kind to Yourself: Grieving isn't a straight path, and you will have some tough days. Celebrate any progress, however small, and show yourself compassion.
The past five years have taught me that grief becomes part of our lives, and we must create space for it. Attending the Expo reminded me that self-care is a lifelong journey. With resources like Remembering A Life, I can feel empowered to honor my story and my husband's memory. Grief has no expiration date, but we can find ways to carry it through self-care, legacy, and connection.
When I share my journey, I hope to inspire others to honor their grief, tell their loved ones' stories, and embrace self-care throughout every chapter of life. Grief stays with us, but so does love.
